An Alternate Ending
by WillandAliciaFan
Summary: This is a fix-it story. Follows cannon up until and including 7x12 with the exception of a few details that will be explained in the first chapter. The story starts at the time of 7x13 and will partially follow cannon through the rest of season 7.


She was in a daze. She was vaguely aware that she was sitting in the courthouse hallway. She was assaulted by images of Will. She had been ever since Eli's confession a few weeks prior. His face was constantly before her as fate mocked her for her choices that she now regretted. The way he looked at her, fire in his eyes, when he called her poison. The cold stony stare as she sat near his office waiting for a deposition a few days later. The almost amicable encounter they had the day before he was shot. The way he would adoringly look at her up until that fateful moment when she poisoned their relationship with her cowardice to not follow her heart and her selfishness to further her own career at any cost.

Lucca snapped her out of her thoughts and they headed into court.

Later after court she and Lucca were discussing possibly suing Judge Shakowski. That's not something a lawyer in their right mind would do, but Alicia wasn't in her right mind. She was reeling and this was reckless. It was potential career suicide, but she didn't care. Maybe that was even why she was doing it.

They were interrupted by a knock at the door. Alicia went to answer it. She was surprised to find Kalinda there.

"Sorry for just showing up. I tried calling, but you didn't answer."

Alicia used to answer when she assumed Kalinda was calling for work, and usually, it was, but since they do not currently work together, Alicia had seen no reason to answer her calls.

Alicia stood in the doorway making it clear she was not inviting Kalinda in. Kalinda got the hint. "I'll be quick. Diane got a call from one of Will's sisters today. They're taking him off of life support in another week. The doctors say the chances of him ever waking up are practically zero, and they've come to accept that. They're waiting a week to give anyone, who wants a chance to visit him and say good-bye to do so. I just thought you might want to know." With that she turned and left. Even after Will was shot, their shared grief hadn't repaired their relationship, but Kalinda still cared and wanted to make sure that Alicia knew, not knowing if anyone else would inform her.

Alicia watched as Kalinda turned to leave. Words caught in her throat. Kalinda hadn't waited for a response anyway. The news hit Alicia like a punch in the gut, but she continued on with the rest of her day, going through the motions like she had been for sometime. The next morning as she ate breakfast, her pain was becoming too much for her to bear. By this time next week, Will would really be gone - really gone. For the first few months after shooting, she had kept up hope that he would wake up. Over time, she too had given up hope, but as long as he was connected to life support, he wasn't completely gone. She had somewhat taken solace knowing that life still pulsed through his veins.

She found herself sitting behind Eli's desk waiting for him to arrive to work. When he did, she asked him for the details of the deleted voicemail. He tried to avoid it, but she wouldn't let him off the hook. It may have been nearly six years, but if there hadn't been a day that he hadn't thought about it, as he claimed, he should remember. She needed to know. She needed to hear it from Eli because it was becoming clear that she never would be able to hear it from Will.

"You want to know what my plan is? My plan is, I love you. I've loved you, probably ever since Georgetown. So call me. I'll meet you anywhere, and we can make a plan. If none of this makes sense to you, then just ignore this message. No hard feelings. We'll just go back to the way things were."

She tried to process what Eli had just said to her. Will loved her. He had told her he loved her. He had loved her since Georgetown. He never said anything after that night because he thought by her silence she didn't feel the same way. And then there were all of the other things that got in the way afterwards that kept them apart. She had kept them apart. But she never knew that he loved her, that he wanted to make a plan to make something between them work. She can't know how she would have responded had she got the message at the time, but she was never given the chance. The opportunity had been taken from her. Eli had taken the choice away from her. Her anger at him and not subsided, nor had her anger at herself or at Jeffrey Grant, nor at any of their multiple instances of bad timing.

She stormed out of Eli's office and back to court. There was a fire raging inside of her, and anyone and everyone in her path was likely to get burnt.

* * *

The case against Shakowski was not going well. It really wasn't surprising. Going against a sitting judge was never a good idea. She didn't care. Nothing mattered anymore. She was drowning personally and professionally. There was no lifeboat, and even if there was, she wasn't sure she would climb on. She just had no will left to continue.

At Alicia's apartment while discussing strategy, Alicia excused herself. Lucca was fed up with her disinterest and called her on it. She follows Alicia to the laundry room where Alicia has begun distracting herself by sorting whites and colors and asked her what was going on.

Alicia just starts letting it all out. "I was in love. I just found out that he had left me a message that he loved me. I never got it. He never knew I loved him too, and now it's too late. He's in a coma for two years, and in a few days his sisters are going to have the doctor's pull the plug. I hurt him, and then he hated me. I'll never be able to tell him how sorry I am for what I did. I'll never be able to make it up to him. I'll never be able to tell him I love him. Nothing seems to matter without him in my life or at least him being alive. I don't want his life to be over. I can't bring myself to go say goodbye, but I can't bear the thought of never seeing him again. I just want all of this to be over. I want it all to end."

Lucca closes the space between them and embraces Alicia as she cries. "It's not too late. You can go see him and tell him everything you need to while he's still alive. You won't get a response, but that doesn't mean that he won't hear you. You won't know if he forgives you or if he still loves you, but he'll know how you feel. If you don't go, you'll regret it forever. You can't change anything happened in the past, but at least if you tell him now, that's one less thing to regret."

Alicia decided Lucca was right, but it would have to wait. She needed to go to court, and they needed a lawyer.

Cary agreed to represent the two of them and he had Kalinda do her magic and try to find some evidence to help their case. In the end, though, it looked like there was no way for Alicia and Lucca to come out on top. Alicia was reviewing their firm's finances. A settlement would definitely send them to bankruptcy and out of business. She was headed to the kitchen for a drink when her phone rang. She saw Kalinda's name on the caller ID and thought maybe she had found something that would help with the case, so she answered.

"Hello."

"Hey, I'm glad I got you." Kalinda sounded upbeat.

In another time or another place, Alicia would have been hopeful from that tone in Kalinda's voice, but now, little held meaning for her, so she she just waited without feeling to hear the news.

"Diane got another call from Will's sisters. He squeezed Sarah's hand earlier today, and a CAT scan confirmed increased brain activity. There's a greater chance he may eventually wake up, so they're not going to be pulling the plug after all."

Alicia was stunned. She felt a faint glimmer of hope and that was enough for her to begin to pull out of her depression and to start caring about what went on around her.

Once again words caught in her throat, but she was able to get out a "Thank you for calling."

Not one minute after she hung up with Kalinda, there was a knock at her door. Eli was standing there to plead his case for forgiveness. Alicia let him ramble on for a minute or so before she cheerfully told him he was forgiven. She wasn't really sure she should, but she was feeling generous. Hope was flowing through her veins and she had no interest in grudges at the moment.

Cary once again made an offer for them to join the firm and let the firm's malpractice insurance cover the settlement. Alicia would have to be a junior partner, but that didn't bother her. She'd be employed. The fallout from her reckless lawsuit against Shakowski would be behind her. And tomorrow, she was going to see Will. She was going to tell him everything that she should have told him all along. It didn't matter that he couldn't respond. She didn't need forgiveness or acceptance. She just needed for him to know. No matter whether he woke up or not, she needed to know that he knew how she felt. Even if he were to wake up while she was there and scream at her to get out (a fear that she had that had kept her away) she was going to stop being a coward and talk to him.


End file.
